Routine Household Disputes

Routine Household Disputes (RHD)
Definition: Issues, usually relating to household logistics, of minor consequence that emerge repeatedly throughout cohabitating adult's lives. When taken cumulatively, despite their minor consequences, RHDs can be infuriating.

Let me paint the picture. Last night I was sitting up in bed engrossed in a magazine while Mr G was pottering around getting organised.

Mr G: How do you think the Greece economy will affect out household in the next few years?
(Actually he didn't ask this question. At least I don't think he did. I was so engrossed in my magazine I don't know what he asked.)
Me: Yes.
Mr G: Are you listening to me?
Me: Sorry what did you say?
Mr G: Is that a bridal magazine you're reading?
Me: Yes. As a matter of fact it is. Of these dresses which one is your favourite?
Mr G: Are you kidding? Why are you reading a bridal magazine? I have been wondering why that's here.
(At this point I should point out for any new readers that Mr G and I are already married. We had a lovely wedding almost three years ago and there are no repeats on the horizon.)Me: Because I love weddings and I got given it an event. Anyway there's something else I want to talk about.
Mr G: I can hardly wait.
(He didn't say this in words but his facial expression did.)Me: I'm planning a blog on our routine household disputes.
(Very not thrilled face crumple from Mr G)
Mr G: Oh you mean the one where we argue about how much I do around the house without help?
Me: Err, no. Not that one.

Because that one doesn't exist! Well only very occasionally. Mr G then went on to explain that the reason it seems like he has a higher error margin in the laundry (RHD #1) is because of the sheer volume he washes compared to me. He ends up responsible for lots of colour run disasters whereas I very rarely do. According to Mr G this reflects my meagre laundry contribution measured in quantity. Naturally I argue it reflects my superior skills. But that's not the dispute I need to discuss with you.

Given the change in weather Mr G and I have been locking horns over one particular issue: temperature. Is there an issue that causes more angst between cohabitating adults?? Certainly not in this household. Mr G is largely immune to the cold.

Take Tuesday morning, for example. It was a crisp 11 degrees in Sydney and Mr G was wearing jeans and a t-shirt. "Would you like to get a jumper?" I caringly asked on the off-chance Mr G had mistaken our home town for Darwin as we headed out the door. "If you have a good immune system you don't need layers*." Say WHAT??? (RHD #2) I should say that Mr G is intelligent and trained in the medical profession. And yet!! I actually suspect the cold weather does affect Mr G: his judgement in particular.

Which brings me to our RHD #3. Read carefully here because I need your help. We play this game where Mr G opens every window in our apartment and I close them. And then he opens them and I close them. Then he opens them and usually I go a bit berserk. (This pattern is repeated in our RHD #4 where Mr G unplugs every appliance in our house. Daily.)

To be fair Mr G agrees that in winter, at night time, windows can be closed. Joy! But. First thing every morning he opens them. Why? Because he says keeping the windows open warms the apartment by letting in the heat. From WHERE, I ask often?? So my question is this - does opening the windows in winter warm the house???

Think wisely before you answer because my marriage depends on it. Kidding! The beauty of RHDs (as opposed to Extraordinary Houshold Disputes) is they don't have the ability to derail a relationship. See most RHDs turn on which party has the right answer; and being definitively right – on any issue – in the NABM household is a wonderful, wonderful thing. So am I right???

Do you have RHDs? If you share I promise I'll tell you you're right!

*While I've been writing this Mr G actually texted me a link to this article.